Author Archives: McKennaRishmawy

the Hair stuff., the Me stuff., the Skin stuff.

In praise of Whole Foods … or, I blame the hippies.

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Long have I praised the good name of Whole Foods to my friends and on this blog for its wealth of natural resources when it comes to beauty, but I’d be lying if I didn’t admit that I’ve felt somewhat judged for my devotion to the establishment. But I get it- Whole Foods can be a real hotbed of pretentious bobos. I find myself throwing massive shade at the folks wandering around the place every time I visit. Wealthy forty-somethings driving their nice cars, fresh from their CrossFit workouts, making a quick stop at Whole Foods to pick up their certified organic produce that costs ten dollars per pound, or their preservative-free kale chips, or their Vegenaise, and other things that make life not much fun. Buuuut my allegiance to Whole Foods, or at least the health and beauty department, cannot be denied. Like the need for a tax increase on Bod Man body spray for men, it cannot be denied.

I didn’t exactly stumble into a Whole Foods one day and then just fall in love with what I found there. In fact, I’m sure it was quite the opposite. I recall health food stores in the nineties being more associated with the blue-haired folk, trying to preserve the last signs of life and vitality (along with their colon). But then something happened with the turn of the century, and I think it was Al Gore (which kind of spoils the fun), but suddenly “green” became the hip thing to do. Green was everywhere. Green cars, green food sourcing, and green beauty. I can’t remember exactly what started me down my journey of green beauty, but it’s come to my attention in recent years (I’ve been trying to go green for about five) that Whole Foods is thee mecca for effective green beauty brands. Here, a look at my local (and HUGE) Whole Foods:

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My particular store that I go to is pretty big, but that’s good news for all of us because the selection is overwhelming in the most awesome way. There’s every kind of “green” brand that you may find in Target or a drugstore, but keep in mind that a lot of these brands suffer from what folks call “green washing”, or the appearance that the product is safe and natural but doesn’t contain a list of truly trustworthy ingredients. The packaging or container might be biodegradable, but perhaps the actual product isn’t. Or there maybe are a select amounts of organic oils within the product, but the rest of it is made of synthetic crap like everything else. Your best strategy- learn to read a list of ingredients and educate yourself on some of the most risky ingredients found in body and beauty products. This kind of information is available easily with just a Google search. I also highly recommend reading The Green Beauty Guide by Julie Gabriel. I love brands like Weleda, Dr. Bronner’s, Desert Essence Organics (at least for their face products, but not for hair), and John Masters Organics for their very clean ingredients.

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Some of the skincare brands found at Whole Foods (and Sprout’s or Mother’s Market, too) can be pricier compared to, say, an eight-dollar bottle of Neutrogena moisturizer, but I’m convinced it’s worth it. Some will argue that their skin does just as well with a drugstore brand and that there isn’t a need to switch to greener products, but I say if you can cut out any shady chemical ingredients (with links to early-onset Alzheimer’s and various cancers) while maintaining great skin for a few dollars more, why not?!

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If you do enough reading on blogs or in magazines associated with beauty, you’ll begin to memorize the names of a few cult products that celebrities and artists swear by (but I’ve still yet to understand why Maybelline’s Great Lash mascara has such a stellar reputation … I hate that stuff!). One such product is this stuff called Egyptian Magic, a pomade kind of thing loaded with honey and different kinds of oils that treats the skin beautifully when slathered on regularly. However, a jar of it will set you back somewhere close to forty bucks! But check out the product that’s always sitting right next to it- Medicine Mama’s Sweet Bee Magic. The ingredient list is exactly the same and it costs half the price of Egyptian Magic. So while you’re foregoing the idea of owning the Egyptian Magic cult-favorite elixir, you’re getting a way better deal with Sweet Bee!

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And here, the one product that I swear by for every use under the sun- Dr. Bronner’s Magic Castile Soap. This stuff might be one of the most trusted brands among all green health and beauty names, and what’s awesome about it is that it’s truly all-purpose. We use it for body wash, but just yesterday I scrubbed my tub with it, used a bit to wash some dishes, and have even used a bit for washing my clothes when I was low on detergent! You can use it on your baby, your car, anything. And it comes in multiple scents, every one of which you can find at Whole Foods.

Like I’ve said, you can find some of these brands elsewhere (and possibly for a higher price), but you hit all the bases at a Whole Foods. I think they have Burt’s Bees there, too (which has a great reputation) and a whole slew of other lines that I haven’t even tried. If I can convince you to even just change one thing in your routine (and my vote is to start with Dr. Bronner’s), I’ve won! xo, MR

the Hair stuff., the Makeup stuff., the Skin stuff.

The weird, the helpful, and the not-so-weird: Some practical and perhaps unconventional beauty tips

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“Best beauty tips ever”. This is a commonly-used headline splashed on the covers of women’s magazine nearly every month. Don’t tell me you haven’t seen it. Typically it’s all the same stuff: turn your head upside when you blow your hair out for volume, wear sunscreen every day and reapply constantly (which, please, no one does unless you’re Nicole Kidman), prevent early signs of ageing by not smoking, drink plenty of water. It’s all pretty intuitive stuff, but none of the typical advice we find in magazines is … I don’t know … new?

I like weird-but-practical beauty tips. I like hearing about the strange little habits that seem to make all the difference in someone’s beauty routine. That’s where the good stuff is- when you find out that your mom used to use an iron to flat-iron her hair. You think I’m kidding? How do you think everyone managed to copy Cher’s pin-straight locks in the seventies? It warn’t no Brazalian blow-out, that’s for dang sure. So here, a list for you of some of the most helpful and somewhat-odd beauty tips or snippets of advice that I’ve actually found to be effective in their intended purpose. Some of this may not be new at all for you, but have at it anyhow:

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1. Keep your hair in better shape by keeping your nails in better shape. What do these two have to do with each other? Well, I tend to bite my nails, which causes them to tear and have tattered, uneven tips. But if there’s anything I do more than bite my nails, it’s run my fingers through my hair. Run those tattered nails through fine, fragile tresses and riiiiip. I can practically hear the strands of hair gettings caught and torn by my nasty nails. And you don’t even have to bite your nails for them to be uneven; it just happens when we work with our hands. So my advice? File those nails and keep them painted and even. That way, you can run your fingers through your hair all you like without the risk of ripping your strands. Speaking of hands and nails …

2. Use sunscreen as hand lotion instead of, well, hand lotion. We’ve gotten increasingly better at hiding signs of ageing on our faces, but there’s one commonly-forgotten part of our body that’s always a dead giveaway when it comes to age, and it’s the hands. Seriously, you may not be able to tell a woman’s age by her face so much these days, but see if you can get a look at her hands. Sunspots, wrinkles, dry and leathery skin … it’s all usually found there. The easiest solution I can think of is just using sunscreen for hands instead of common hand lotion, which moisturizes temporarily but offers no sun protection.

3. Cold showers. Not the most relaxing experience, but I swear they improve circulation and wake you up more efficiently, your skin tends not to dry out so much, and they’re great for adding shine and decreasing frizz in your hair. Which leads me to my next bit …

4. Treat your showers as if they’re traumatic for your hair, not therapeutic. So many of us go all lather-crazy when we wash our hair, and we pile it on top of our heads and just start to scrub away as if our hair likes it. The harsh detergents found in most shampoos, combined with rough scrubbing and hard water, tend to promote breakage over time and do more to exasperate our hair than replenish it with lost moisture and nutrients. There’s no need to saturate the ends of your hair with shampoo; just try and keep your shampoo product on your scalp and then gently rub it in a circular motion around your head. Any shampoo run-off will take care of cleaning the ends of your hair. Additionally, there’s also no need to condition your scalp and the top of your head. Your ends are typically in most need of the benefits that conditioner offers, and covering your scalp in conditioner creates build-up that you then have to scrub out, which will probably leave your scalp dry and flaky, and so on and so forth.

5. If you have a zit, you have a zit. There’s pretty much no overnight fix for a pimple. It’s there to stay and will probably be visible for at least 48 hours, and there’s nothing you can do about it. No amount of vigorous scrubbing or picking will make it go away, so do what I’ve been doing these days: Leave it. Leave it completely exposed and deal with it. Don’t cover it with makeup, don’t touch it, don’t spend an extra five minutes washing it cleanser. Just carry on as normal, let it live its short life and, whenever you can, cover it in Mario Badescu’s Drying Lotion. It’s the most effecitve stuff in the smallest amount of time.

6. Turn up the heat on your flat-irons and curling rods. Turn it up, you ask? We’re always getting screamed at by magazines and hair-care companies for using too much heat! True, and you should always apply some kind heat-protective product before blow-drying or anything like that. However, what do you think is more damaging: Passing a flat-iron over the same section of hair five times at 300 degrees, or passing a flat-iron once over a section of hair at 400 degrees? If you’re thinking the former, you’re probably right. Turn up the heat as high as possible (at least for flat-irons) so you can get the heat-styling over with faster without pushing your strands through the damaging process over and over and into oblivion. Oh, and if you truly have damaged your locks? There really is no other solution for getting rid of the damage other than trimming.

7. Salty snacks late at night = puffy eyelids and face in the morning. Trust me, I’m a champ at this. What’s great for depuffing and debloating by morning? Have a cup of fennel tea at night or some grapefruit. Or, if you have time in the morning, put some cold, wet black tea bags on your puffy eyelids and let them rest. The tannin and caffeine in the tea work a small miracle.

8. Bright pink is a more flattering lip color than red, believe it or not. Hot pink makes you look tanner and your teeth look whiter. One of my favorite shades of hot pink is actually a drugstore find- CoverGirl Lip Perfection Lipstick in Spellbound. It’s a phenomenally gorgeous shade of fuschia and it’s perfect for spring.

9. Certain eye makeup looks, like Dianne Agron’s winged eyeshadow and cat-eyeliner, are difficult to pull off without a robot-kind-of-steady hand. For a cat eye, take a credit card and place it at the outer corner of your eyelid, and tilt it slightly upward. Trace along the credit card to create the outer “wing” of your eyeliner once you’ve finished lining the rest of your lid.. This is way easier than trying to do it free-hand. I find this technique is executed most easily with an angled eyeliner brush as opposed to a liquid eyeliner pen. For the punk-rock winged eyeshadow look, go ahead and first apply the eyeshadow all over the lid until you achieve your desired level of color saturation. Don’t worry about being precise. Next, take a concealer brush or a small sponge and dab some concealer on it (and use a cream concealer for this, not a liquid). Starting at the outer corner of your eye, stroke the brush or sponge outward-and-upward, shaping and covering any outlying eyeshadow at an angle. This is a pretty advanced technique a MAC makeup artist taught me, but before I’d always thought that with a look like Dianna’s the eyeshadow actually had to be applied that way with freak levels of precision. Not so! Concealer truly works wonders, doesn’t it?

10. And speaking of makeup brushes … please clean them. Please, please clean them. You can use a little Dr. Bronner’s Magic Soap and some water, or a brush cleaner like Japonesque’s Parian Spirit. Once you’ve applied whatever cleaning agent you’re using, brush them gently on a fiberless towel to rub out excess makeup and let them dry overnight. And whatever you do, do not use those sponges they give you in foundation compacts to apply your makeup. Or at least, use that sponge once, throw it out, and then use a different one every time. Using the same sponge over and over just transfers all the dirt and oil from your face into your makeup, and then back on to your face when you use apply again, and so on. Brushes are always a better bet because you can clean them.

Let me know of any other weird, not-so-weird, or practical beauty advice you’ve found to be helpful over the years. I’m always curious if someone has covered their hair in mayonnaise or something like that and gotten fantastic results. Cheersies! xo, MR

the Makeup stuff., the Me stuff.

Spring is sprung! Not really!

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In case you didn’t know, we’re currently in the middle of New York Fashion Week.  That’s right fools.  Get your calendars straight according to the world of fashion and start ringing in the New Year in September with Fall Fashion Week, and celebrating the mid-year in February with Spring Fashion Week (though both really take place in summer and winter).  I’m not exactly sure how that’s all going to pan out what with Nemo (cute name for a storm, ain’t it?) going down and all, but the folks who make the fashion world go ’round don’t exactly pay attention to things like weather reports when it comes to the bi-annual insanity that is Fashion Week.  Deadly weather be damned!  I can guarantee you that things like high heels and skirts are STILL happening in the midst of all the snowfall, and there are seriously like, ten shows a day happening or something like that.  Fashion peoples be cray.

I’ve been aware of the trends we’re going to be seeing this spring for some time now, and the only one in fashion that I really paid attention to was the surge of graphic black-and-white prints thanks to the likes of Marc Jacobs, Balenciaga, Alexander Wang, DKNY, Louis Vuitton (blame Marc for that one, too), and seriously a bajillion more.  Being that this is a beauty blog, however, I’m more interested in discussing the beauty trends of the season.  The two most prominent beauty trends for the spring of 2013 consist of blue-green shades of eyeshadow (not your Grandma’s shade of periwinkle, by the way, so don’t be rollin’ your eyeballz just yet) and bright orange-red lips.  Now don’t think too hard about trying to do some fancy peacock eyeshadow look when it comes to the former.  I have a fat eyeliner pencil from Sephora in a shimmery shade of aqua that I like lining my eyes with, even just the bottom lid.  And Sephora Rouge lipstick in shade #29 is a flattering, comfortable shade of tomato-ey tangerine for anyone.

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But beyond the specific trends for this spring, I’ll be trying a couple things more often with the hope of integrating the techniques into my everyday look.  First is the tough one- contouring.   You know how sometimes you look at runway models and they almost look as if they’re making a fish-face, sucking in their cheeks and they have cheekbones that look like they could cut glass?  Welp, they’re probably not and they probably don’t.  I mean, chances are that if one is a model then they probably do have very high cheekbones, but I’m telling you- Every model on the runway has undergone some makeup contouring.  This typically involves using a darker shade of foundation or powder foundation, a deeper-but-neutral shade of blush, or a bronzer in the hollows of the cheeks to create the illusion that you have higher cheekbones.  Well-done contouring can even work wonders on the shape of your nose, as well as the forehead and jawline.  Celebrity news blogs and websites will always make a huge fuss over speculation on Kim Kardashian and how it appears like she’s had some kind of surgery on her nose, cheekbones or whatever, but it’s actually all the result of her crazy skills with makeup and contouring.  Believe it or not, Kim is actually very talented with makeup (but she just wears so dang much all the time that I just can’t seem to like it).

I’ve been using NARS Bronzing Powder in Laguna most faithfully for contouring on my own, but I’ve also taken to using a cheaper, darker shade of creamy foundation sometimes too.  Coco Rocha mentioned the tip in an interview I read recently, and it’s worked out well.  I picked up a CoverGirl+Olay Simply Ageless Foundation in Classic Tan, and I just use my fingers to blend it upward into the hollows of my cheeks.  I like to use a powder just under my jawline and a little swipe going from my temples back down into the hollows of my cheekbones.  Think of making a “C” shape with your brush.  For lighter contouring, I also like MAC powder blush in Buff.

As for eyebrows, I’ve taken to the almighty Cara Delevingne as my inspiration lately.  Seriously, this girl is THEE model of the 2010’s if you ask me.  She is EVERYWHERE.  Her bone structure is out of control (though note the contouring on her cheeks!), but it’s her eyebrows that have gotten everyone’s attention.  Dramatic eyebrows have made a serious comeback in the past three years or so thanks to various models like Cara and runway beauty trends, which is good news for me considering I’ve never plucked mine.  Ever.  I’ve never waxed, never had any kind of eyebrow appointment, nothing.  My mama always said I had good eyebrows, and I didn’t really care much until I met Jennifer Connelly’s eyebrows.  Oh dang!  But what I have been doing lately is filling in any uneven patches with an eyebrow pencil and just brushing them out using an eyebrow comb.  And sometimes, when I think of Cara, I just pencil them in a leeeetle bit more … and a little more … and a little more.  I’ve been using two different shades of Make Up For Ever’s eyebrow pencils for a while now, sometimes using both and sometimes choosing one depending on how dark my hair is at the time.

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So below, we’ve got the results of my contouring/eyebrow-loving adventures.  I put a pretty heavy filter on the shot so you could really see where I placed the product (and in this case, it was the CoverGirl).  If you try contouring, don’t be afraid to use a lot.  Results with contouring tend to be a lot more fun as opposed to when you’re too shy.  Now, what will really be fun is when I put a little blonde back in my hair and I still stick with the dark, heavy brows.  I always was disappointed by the assumption that light hair calls for dainty eyebrows.  NO HAIR CALLS FOR DAINTY EYEBROWS.  Shoot, I told my husband last night that I wish mine would grow out and get even bigger!  I wish my eyebrows would just declare mutiny and take over my whole face!  Oh, and whatever you do, DO NOT pluck your blonde (or even dark!) eyebrows into oblivion and then proceed to draw chola brows in their place.  What are chola brows?  THESE.

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So there you have it.  These are my makeup plans for this coming spring- contoured cheeks, strong brows, blood-orange lips, and blue-green eye makeup (though probably not all at once).  Oh, and for those that insist they don’t follow trends, and that “trends are for followers” or “people who can’t think for themselves” or whatever such derp as that- I’m sorry, trends are for people who like to have fun.  Trends are for people who like to play around and try something different.  And don’t you be foolin’ yourself into thinking that you have nothing to do with trends and that you’re some kind of original.  Just refer back to Meryl Streep’s death-kill monologue in The Devil Wears Prada wear she, *ahem*, educates Anne Hathaway’s character and lets her know that everything she’s wearing, and everything she ever chooses to wear, was chosen for her months in advance.  There are those who follows trends, and then those who set them.  And if you’re not in some studio designing and working on your collection right now for your September show, it’s very likely that you’re not a maker of trends.  If you purchase a clothing item, a neat new beauty product, any such thing from a store, congratulations- you follow trends.   And that’s ok!  What on God’s green Earth is WRONG with being a follower, I ask you?!  The world would be a better place if we all chose someone commendable and committed to following them as best as we could instead of trying so desperately to make our own way.  So get out there and copy someone!  Just not this person.  xo, MR

the Makeup stuff.

Fifty shades of NO.

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So, this is Andrea Riseborough.  You may know Andrea as the British film and television actress from movies like W.E. and Never Let Me Go.  You may not know Andrea as a face full of pancake batter, covered in flour, and rolled in sparkly powdered sugar as she’s pictured here.  Seriously, who did this to her.  I’m not even putting a question mark at the end of that statement- WHO DID THIS TO HER.  PERIOD.  What makeup artist got hongray and decided they wanted waffles and then proceeded to paint waffle batter on Andrea’s face?  Were they trying to bake her?  Did they want to stick her face in an oven and make pan rustico? Not fair for Andrea.  Not fair.  Nobody deserves to walk a red carpet looking like a wad of uncooked sweaty dough in the face.

The shade of foundation, IN CASE YOU’RE WONDERING, is a little light.  But what’s worse than that is that someone made the genius decision to apply a shimmery finish powder on her face after already turning her into the pretty child of Michael Jackson.  Now she looks white and sweaty.  BUT THEN, to top it off, they’ve added a nice rubicund glow to her cheeks that has made her now look, white, sweaty, and as if she’s just finished running a 20K.  I’m pretty sure this is how I look when I’ve got a case of the heavin’ upchucks.  Girl is lookin’ all flu season kinds of sexy!  Let this be a warning to us all- natural light, I say.  Do. Your. Makeup. In. Natural. Light. xo, MR

the Makeup stuff., the Me stuff.

When in Rome, do as the French do. Or whatever.

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photo (96)So, I’ve been trying this new thing lately.  I’ve been wearing just red lipstick.  No no, just red lipstick.  I’ll put on my moisturizer, comb my eyebrows if I have a moment (and lightly even them out with a pencil if even more time), and then choose one of my reds and get to paintin’.  And then I’ll leave.  No concealer anywhere, no blush, no mascara, nothing beyond the red lip.  Today was one of these days, and I employed NARS Dragon Girl.  It’s brighter than the more scarlet Cruella, but I’ll take either one.

Considering my inability to wake up in a timely manner, I often find myself lacking the time to put on any sort of makeup before I leave the house for work.  I’ve discussed this before.  But it bums me out.  For as much of a crazy hoarder lady as I am when it comes to makeup, I have to say that I probably wear it just three out of seven days during the week.  It’s depressing too, because putting on makeup has the capabilities of relaxing and centering me, and I have to miss out on that creative moment just for myself.  But part of what prevents me from doing my makeup quickly is this belief that when I do it, I have to do a full routine.  And it’s not that a full routine necessarily takes a ton of time once I get going, but it’s just that I take about as long as an Ent to make a decision when it comes to makeup.  Seriously.  I’ll lay all of my makeup out in front of me and then just stare at it for a few minutes before I pick anything up.

What’s great about the red lip, however, is that it needs nothing else.  It really doesn’t.  No “full routine” is necessary.  I recently read an interview of makeup artist phenom Laura Mercier, and she talked about how you can find women all over her home country of France who wear absolutely no makeup everyday except for red lipstick.  Their hair is perhaps casually pulled back, their skin is bare, but their lips are painted vibrant red.  And somehow the touch of unabashedly glamorous red manages to pull your whole look together.  It looks intentional, and yet it still appears like you didn’t try too hard.  Like you just ascend to Audrey Hepburn levels of sophistication on a regular basis, even if you’re just in a sweater and jeans.

I do admit that I love the French beauty aesthetic a lot more than our American perspective on it.  The French idea of beauty tends to revolve a lot more around the natural and the subtle.  There’s a sense of restraint within French women when it comes to things like makeup and hair, and yet they’ll never be accused of not taking the subject seriously (but not in an obsessive manner like we tend to be used to … think more reverence than obsession).  Conversely, American beauty has few subtleties to it by comparison.  The idealized perception of Barbie and women like those we see in the Miss America pageant, the outlandish plastic surgery procedures we’ll undergo just to feel like a “hotter” version of ourselves, all the gloss, shadow, and false lashes we use, and the heavy face makeup that really doesn’t do a thing for your face other than make you look like the child of RuPaul … seriously, what we tend to perceive as light, day-time makeup here will fly as an over-done full face of crepe batter in France.

It isn’t that French women don’t try; it’s just that there’s a difference between, say, trying to look like a Victoria’s Secret model every day from the time you’re twenty until you’re fifty, as opposed to just simply trying to age gracefully when it needs to happen.  I’d like to think that what I’m doing (and not doing) to my skin today is actually an investment that will pay off when I’m sixty.  And finally, the most interesting part of French beauty culture to me is the fact that there’s zero emphasis on working out.  They take their time with food, eat a very balanced diet, and do plenty of walking, but the gym fanatic culture we see here in America doesn’t exist in France.  Whether a woman has a J.Lo butt and Gwen Stefani abs isn’t really a concern; it has more to do with a woman’s taste and how she carries herself.

I know all of this may sound like the very height of snobbery, and for that I apologize.  It’s just that getting acquainted with the French idea of beauty over the past couple years has given me the realization that getting ready, or should I say getting pulled together in a sophisticated way, doesn’t have to be as hard as a routine of eye makeup, face makeup, and curled hair.  In fact, sometimes doing just the opposite has a much chicer effect, and this has been nothing short of freeing for me personally.  Because I feel like concealer, bronzer, blush, eyeliner, and mascara are all necessary when I do my makeup, I give up on all of it all together when I don’t have the time.  But not so with the French!  Just grab the rouge and go, and if it can be so with the French, it can be so for moi.  xo, MR

p.s. Oh, have I been to France?  Nope.  But let me just say this- when I get there, DO NOT expect to find me galavanting around like an excited tourist.  I intend to blend in seamlessly, even if it means wearing a paper bag on my head as some kind of fashion-forward “statement” so I can hide from you.  I need to be taken seriously by the people that I so admire, and I’ll be not be outed by you ID-ing me as a ‘Murican!  If there is a ever a time when I need to look like I can cut you with my gaze, it’s when you find me in Paris.  I’ll be wearing the most uncomfortable plantar-fascitis-inducing heels with the most awesome, heavy, bad-for-travelling-but-good-for-looking-like-Catherine-Denueuve coat I can find.  I don’t have time for your comfy sweater-sets and walking shoes and backpacks!  What is that kind of foolery?!  Don’t look at me with your fanny pack in Paris.  DON’T look at me.

the Friends stuff., the Hair stuff.

I’m into this.

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So, my last post accrued a lot of good attention and feedback.  However, it took a ton of consideration and editing.  It’s been a long week without much sleep, and I’m not currently in a frame of mind to produce something like that just 72 hours after finishing the last product.  And yet some things, and some posts, can turn out just as well without a ton of consideration and editing.  They’re awesome in a straight-forward kind of way.  The same goes for some haircuts.

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Now, what with my whole bias toward long hair and all, you may be surprised to see a short cut appearing on here.  Well, yes, I continue to proclaim my undying affinity for long that you can braid and brush and all that, but there are still short cuts on some gals that just werk.  I’d have a difficult time picturing Caley here without her short hair.  It’s perfect.  She styles it so many ways, with this being one of her more haphazard whatever! days, if you can believe it.  I’m all about this.  I don’t know if there will ever come a day when you’ll see the same on me, but who cares?  Caley’s too busy owning it anyways!

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Terri’s another woman that I could not ever picture without her hair as it is.  It’s messy and amazing, with blonde highlights that never go to her roots for that great beachy look (and who knew beachy could happen without long California-surfer-girl waves?).  It’s funny how Terri’s hair is so quintessential to her character.  It’s her trademark- undeniably fun, modern, happy, maybe even frazzled.  She’s been my  boss at the coffee shop I’ve worked at for almost seven years, and I literally think I’d cry if she did anything different to her hair, ever.  It would seriously feel like losing a mom.

With the first day of February arriving tomorrow, I’m anxious with anticipation over the coming season.  Next month is Fashion Month and we’ll be seeing what’s in store for Fall 2013, but even more so I’m looking forward to just celebrating the spring that we’re about to usher in.  I’ve started my own tradition of changing up my hair a bit during each bi-annual Fashion Month (once in September and once in February), and so I’ve got my images all set to show my wizard in a just couple weeks.  I’d encourage you to do the same, and if you’re feeling extra bold I dare you to give one of these kick-butt looks a shot.  xo, MR

the Hair stuff., the Magazine stuff., the Makeup stuff., the Me stuff.

Oh now THIS is the kind of thing I LIVE for!!

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Oh how thoroughly disappointing the SAG Awards were tonight.  The Golden Globes had been somewhat of a bore for me as well, and so I’d truly been looking forward to tonight’s red carpet with the hopes that someone … anyone … would put on a dress to make my jaw drop.  But alas, my jaw remains fully closed and in fact a little clenched in frustration.  Nights like this kill me.  I mean, yes, it’s great to look all boring kinds of sexy in a column dress so everyone can see that you can work your curves and blah blah blah, but let me tell you- I will continue to throw this at you until someone tops it.  When you, as a celebrity, have access to literally every great designer’s atelier on this planet and each one of those designers would give their right leg to dress you, thou shalt NOT waste my time with another monochromatic mermaid gown on the red carpet.  Grow a pair and actually take advantage of the fashion that’s at your over-privileged, perfectly manicured fingertips.  I mean seriously!  Do I have to rely on mah boo Marion for EVERYTHING?!

And so we’re moving on from this discussion to something else that’s fascinated me lately.  Oh, and how!  So, I purchased the latest issue of Self magazine for the purpose of motivating myself into a more regular gym routine.  I’d initially inserted about a million jokes here when first writing this, but I have to admit this is a completely true desire, void of any irony.  No, I’m not looking to Instagram pictures of my Fergie abs while I frolick around in a bikini at Stagecoach.  But I am looking to take seriously the idea that man cannot live on Cheetos alone, and if one does, a price must be paid in copious amounts of running and veggie consumption.

But I stumbled upon something funny while perusing this latest issue of Self, and it did nothing short of fuel the fires of Mount Doom in my Fergie tummy.

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Well, well, well, what have we here?!  The kind of article I live for- the kind that asks what guys really think of the stuff we do with our hair, face, and body, and how we should take such opinions into account when we get ready to bring our ugly selves out of our Hobbit holes and into daylight for presentation!  Excellent!

So, I guess the deal with these is that you’ve got some panel of highly qualified dudes (guys that know lots about the wiminfolks, cause they haz a Y-chromosome and eyeballz) that look at various celebrity photos and rate YEAH, BRAH! or NAH, BRAH! while throwing back a can of mildly-flavored pee Coors Light.  Totes fersh, breh.  And so above we have our first exhibit- Jessica Biel demonstrating nail color and ombre’d hair.  The verdict on nails?  Well Lord bless ’em, the lads say they don’t care!  Sweet relief for us!  “That’s something only girls notice”, dude-breh-number-one says.  Oh, but notice that dude-breh says those nails had BETTER NOT be chipped, lest we be perceived as someone who has a life doesn’t have time to keep her nails perfectly manicured!

And the verdict on ombre’d hair?  A resounding “Hell, no!” from dude-breh-number-two.  His reasoning?  “She looks like she didn’t make it to the salon for a year.”  Right.  Because like the dude-brehs always say, they definitely don’t want a girl who looks like she “tries too hard” or “wears makeup”, but we can’t be having a woman looking like she doesn’t try hard enough either.  MAKES SENSE.  I’m sorry Patrick Bateman, but it’s been hard trying to find that right balance between J. Lo and Jennifer Garner for you, or excuse me, that right balance between CAN’T and CAN’T for you.  If Jessica Biel’s hair looks “un-maintained” to you, look forward to seeing me looking nothing short of BEAT next season when I get mine re-ombre’d.  Consider it my gift to you.

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Let’s see, the next victims- Blake Lively with her fishtail braid, short-haired girls, the how-much-makeup question, and a few others.  Of course, that braid is a no from the dude-brehs because “it probably took three hours”.  No, you dum-dum.  It took three minutes because the thing’s probably a bloody extension.  And even if it isn’t (considering Blake is known to have Rapunzel hair), bear this in mind the next time your girlfriend has nice, blown-out, shiny hair that’s left down and casual with soft, “effortless” waves- that probably took three hours.

Oh and take note- NO SHORT HAIR.  DUDE-BREH WILL NOT APPROACH YOU AND OFFER YOU A JAGER BOMB FROM HIS ED HARDY-ADORNED SELF IF YOU’VE GOT THE SHORT HAIRS.  But we are told, quite graciously, “If you look like Halle Berry, then you can go short”.  Oh thanks man!  I mean, I know that Halle spends literally thousands of dollars to maintain her looks each year alone and that if any of us did that you’d immediately judge us for being “too high maintenance”, but it’s a free pass for Halle and all her look-alikes!  Oh wait, there are no Halle look-alikes?  And even Halle doesn’t look like Halle without her Revlon to make her Photo-Ready?  Woops.

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Here are a few more.  We’re given the green light for glossy lips because  apparently they say “a girl wants to make out”, and we’re given a thumbs-down on sleek hair with this astute observation- “Bet she’s wearing really uncomfortable shoes”.  But have hope!  Here’s what we’re finally left with as a conclusion:  We’re told in the Editor’s note on the right that “Confidence trumps all, and they want to sleep with you no matter what.  Like what you see in the mirror.”  Oh, I see, so back-track on this entire article because you know it’s the most misogynistic thing you may have ever published in your sorry magazine, but be SURE to validate us in the best, most helpful way possible- by reassuring us that every guy wants to sleep with us just because we’re … girls.

I can’t even begin to delve into the devastating moral and spiritual implications of this article, but I’ll attempt to be brief in my commentary.  Magazines like Self claim to celebrate you as you, and yet they’re fraught with quiet-yet-somehow-explicit suggestions on how to make yourself better, more desirable, more worthy of that celebration.  Some of these suggestions, as in ones pertaining to diet and health in general, are genuinely helpful and sometimes necessary in our lives.  Others, however, are backwards and hypocritical to a degree that has the potential to lay waste to anything helpful a publication may previously have done.  It is frustrating that this article was found in a magazine written for women, and by women, but features like this truly do a disservice to both sexes.  Women are once again subjected to depthless, crude evaluation that leaves them insecure and anxious, and they’re fed the lie that the ultimate compliment a guy could possibly pay you is wanting you physically.  Men, on the other hand, are portrayed as animalistic, thoughtless jackasses that could not care less about the content of one’s character because they’re solely interested in sex.  It’s a bloody shame, it is.

Here’s what I’ll leave you with- Try the weird hair-do.  Put on the red lipstick that may cause a couple guys to say you look like a clown (true story in my life).  Wear no makeup.  Wear too much makeup.  Make “mistakes”.  And extend the same grace to the dude-brehs when they wear too much Tim McGraw cologne, when they’ve got an awful case of the neck-beard, or when they think it’s cool to look like this.  We’ll all keep up with our same weird beauty and grooming habits, and I’ll keep blogging about all of it.  Do this for fun.  Do this because you like it.  And if it bothers you that I don’t like your sock-bun, just do it anyways.  You know you love that hairy donut on top of your head.  Don’t let me take that love from you.  xo, MR

the Hair stuff., the Review stuff., the Skin stuff.

Chronicles of the Amazon Shampoo Hunter

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I haven’t posted in well over one week.  That seems like forever ago.  A LOT has happened within this past week, but I’m feeling quite cozy and pleasant now that it’s Friday and the week has come to its end.  It was finals week for the kiddos at school and the Friday after is always a day off for them,  and therefore a day off for me too.  So what does one like me do on a rainy Friday off?

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DRIVE FAR TOO MANY MILES IN PURSUIT OF THE GREATEST NATURAL LUXURY SHAMPOO!!  DUH!  WHAT DO YOU THINK THIS IS? A BLOG ABOUT SPENDING TIME WISELY?!

No but really.  I don’t have kids yet, and I’m not the one grading the finals yet, so you can bet your mother’s rump that I’m going to suck the juice out of this free time while I can.  No excuses.

So I’ve been using my John Masters Organics Evening Primrose shampoo for quite some time now, and as happy as I’ve been to find a truly safe, plant-based shampoo for my precious locks, I’d been hearing through the grapevine that I could do even better.  It’s been particularly dry out lately (I mean like lips-cracked-and-bleeding-dry), and so while I know that dry scalp may be a consequence of this, I’ve been noticing that the John Masters has been leaving my own scalp feeling, um, stripped at times?  Of course, that’s nothing a healthy dose of conditioner can’t help, but you know me.  If I can do one better for my hair, you know I’ll try anything and you know by “anything”, that includes the possibility of going all Rambo on a few choice endangered plant and animal species.

The latest rumors have it that the very best in natural hair care (and don’t get me wrong- John Masters is still up there) is a name called Rahua (pronounced RA-WA as far as I know).  The key to this line is a potent restorative oil previously known only to the women of the Quechua-Shuar tribe in Ecuador’s Amazonian rainforests.  CAN’T MAKE THAT UP.  A couple blogs that I keep up with every twenty minutes have frequently boasted the name of Rahua, and so my itchy scalp and I decided to get along down south to the only location I know of that carries the line- a Planet Beauty on Bristol and MacArthur just off the 405 freeway in Newport Beach (or am I in Irvine?  Where am I?  We’ll just say I’m in a rich peoples’ shopping center).

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This Planet Beauty is huge.  It’s a legitimate planet.  Apparently it’s the original location as well, and to my surprise it had no shortage of the rare, luxury brands that I’ve been reading about for years now.  Many of them I still cannot afford and dare not spend the tuppence on, but it was still weird finding them.  It was like meeting a celebrity, like running into Alan Arkin at a Souplantation or something.

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Rodin’s Olio Lusso is the stuff of the gods for celebrity skincare.  It is literally thee product that famed makeup artist Tom Pecheaux massages in Victoria’s Secret models’ faces before applying makeup for their annual fashion show (because I’m sure they all need more pampering … dem poor widdle models!).  Rodin’s site lists the special oils that the stuff is comprised of, but at $150 per 1 fluid-ounce bottle (make sure to clean up the floor now that you’ve spit up your lunch), I have a funny feeling that there’s some other ingredient Rodin ain’t letting us in on.  TINY BITS OF JERKED SNOW LEOPARD, RODIN?!  OR THE TEARS OF THE JOLIE-PITT TWINS?!  You can’t keep secrets from the American public for long!

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Here we have the full line of Tata Harper skincare, sitting right at the front entrance like it’s no big deal.  I once used a free sample of her Reparative Moisturizer and I have to say, I got a nice case of Doutzen Kroes face for the day.  It was great!  What was even better?  Wasting my Doutzen Kroes face on five classes of freshmen who literally could not care less because they’re too busy popping their own zits.  I’ll be saving that sample for when I do something swank next time, like when I go to Mother’s Market and order a juice.

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This Planet Beauty location also carries the full lines of Sonya Dakar and Dr. Hauschka skincare, with the latter known for being very natural and very potent.  Jennifer Aniston is known to use Dr. Hauschka’s products, along with various other celebrities that can do things like buy horses for fun (unlike us lay-folk, who buy horses for transportation).  Even Madonna itself uses Dr. Hauschka’s line, and look how well-preserved that thing is!

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And finally, I happened upon this- the full line of Kerastase hair products, save for the one product from the line that I use.  Of course!  But I was still quite overjoyed to see the rest of the full spread here, which is typically so hard to find.  And this photo doesn’t even cover the whole selection they had!  I will also say that I got to feel like quite a professional for one minute as I gave a customer the run-down on the whole line and what each color family is for.  But what product did I ultimately sell her on?  My amazing Rahua shampoo harvested straight out of the rainforest!  Let’s hear it for the natives!  Did I tell her I haven’t used the stuff yet?  No!  Did I tell her it’s awesome and she’ll be amazed by the glorious Kate Beckinsale-like results?  Yes!  Who loves lying?!  ME!

There were countless other luxury brands crammed into this tiny little gem of retail space- Philip B., Mustela (a line of great baby products that make Johnson & Johnson’s look like chemical waste), Kai, Juliette’s Got a Gun, the entire Davines line, Rene Furterer, and a billion more.  I would have to say that it’s been a Friday afternoon well-spent (and fear not- I’ve balanced out my super fun times by doing a little work and reading for my thesis). I’ll be letting you know how my Amazon shampoo turns out, and hopefully it’s a success and I don’t have to fear the wrath of that stranger I sold it to.  xo, MR

the Makeup stuff., the Review stuff., the Skin stuff.

B.B. creams and my scheme for becoming the Hulk.

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I have many dream jobs.  Many dream jobs.  I dream of being a makeup artist to the celebrities (though I hear from Laura Mercier that you have ZERO-POINT-ZERO life when you achieve such a status).  I dream of doing animation voice-overs for cartoons because apparently my impressions of Butters and the oh-long-Johnson cat are impeccable.  I dream of writing for fashion and beauty publications (so feel free to pay me for this any time, or do you pride yourself in robbing the poor and disenfranchised?).  I dream of being a spectacular teacher that is somehow able to incorporate culture and film and art into every lesson on American history.  I dream of being a model because I’m hot for approximately two out of seven days during the week so long as I remember to shower and check my feet for toe jam.  I dream of being a professional restaurant reviewer that literally must only eat the best food your sorry fanny can serve up in a five-star kitchen.  And bring me a side of Takis with that lobster bisque, you lemming!

But most of all … I dream of being paid for the oh-so-miserable task of reviewing makeup products.  And I’m even willing to be a human tester for the unfinished products too so the lab rabbits no longer have to suffer!  Animal testing typically involves a product being placed directly on to an animal’s eyes or skin, and if they go crazy from pain and perhaps break their own necks while struggling to free themselves from the restraint they’re being held in, then the consensus is that the formula probably needs some improvement before showing up at your local drugstore as the latest and greatest liquid foundation to slather all over your face.  Am I making this up?  Nope.  So test unfinished products on my eyes, I say!  Maybe a  faulty new eyeliner formula will turn my eyes violet and I can be Elizabeth Taylor come back from the dead with a search-and-destroy mission on Lindsay Lohan for soiling my good name with Liz & Ick (you read that right).  Or even better, a testing of a bad moisturizer will turn me into the Hulk (the Ed Norton kind).  I’ve always wanted to be able to open tightly-sealed jars of salsa without crying and bruising my fingerbones.  HULK SMASH SALSA JAR!  Or maybe it’ll just turn me into Ed Norton.  Either way, I’ll get more respect and more free meals.

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So for the moment, I’ll choose to review a product that’s already passed the rabbit-neck-break test.  Actually, I don’t think the B.B. cream I’ve tried even had a rabbit-neck-break test to begin with because the brand I’ve used says a big fat no to lab rabbits (or as I like to call them, “labbits”)!  That brand would be Boscia, by the way.  It’s a Japanese skincare line that’s a little more on the pricier end of things, but they produce some seriously good stuff.

I first read about B.B. creams (or Beauty Balms, or Blemish Balms) maybe two years ago, I believe in either Vogue or Elle.  The idea sounded fantastic, like the ultimate multifunctional tinted moisturizer.  Their alleged purpose is to provide hydration, conceal imperfections and give natural coverage, firm and even out skin tone, protect from future damage with SPF, and repair existing flaws with ingredients like antioxidants.  It read like a hybrid of makeup and skincare.  They’d originated in Japan and had already started trickling into the United States through brands like Dr. Jart, Boscia, and Dior, and I was interested.  I’m not really into foundation (especially for everyday use), but the idea of something that could provide a light bit of evening-out along with sun protection sounded like a good way to ramp up my routine.

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I purchased the Boscia B.B. Cream SPF 27 PA++ (with PA being a superior grade of UVA protection) at Sephora and gave it a shot.  And you know what?  I liked it, and I still use it!  It comes in one self-adjusting shade and it blends extraordinarily well.  I also can’t express enough appreciation for it’s lack of phthalates, parabens, and sulfates (though it still has PEGs and lots of “-cones”). Now, have I tried any other B.B. creams?  Nope?  Do I intend to?  Nope.  I’ve found a high-quality one that I love and, as far as I know, is the most natural one currently on the market counting both drugstore and luxury brands.  And as I’ve explained before, I’d rather pay more for safer, higher-quality ingredients (or at the very least, fewer sketchy ingredients), especially when it comes to face makeup.  So do I recommend this product?  Yes.  Below, I’ve applied a light layer of the B.B. cream.  Pretty even with a decently dewy finish, I’d say.

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And there you have it- my one review of the only B.B. cream I’ll probably ever use (and I don’t wear it everyday because I don’t wear makeup everyday), and my plan to give myself up for animal rights so I can become the Hulk or an undead Liz Taylor or a reasonably healthy Ed Norton.  Be at peace now that your day has been nothing short of MADE.  xo, MR